


On the Sunny Side of the Street: Debbie

by oiuytrewq36



Series: Soundtrack Trilogy, combined and expanded [8]
Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:41:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28682706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oiuytrewq36/pseuds/oiuytrewq36
Summary: Brian’s started coming over early before Sunday dinner, the past few months. Sometimes - more often than not, amazingly enough - he sets the table and asks questions about my and Carl’s life that I’m sure physically pain him; other weeks, he sits and sulks on the couch until I get him to talk.Once in a while, he’ll show up with scared wounded eyes and no smart remarks. He’s like that today, pale and tired, hands shoved deep in his coat pockets, so I coax him to the living room and offer him hot chocolate on pain of death.
Relationships: Brian Kinney/Justin Taylor (Queer as Folk)
Series: Soundtrack Trilogy, combined and expanded [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2077905
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	On the Sunny Side of the Street: Debbie

Brian’s started coming over early before Sunday dinner, the past few months. Sometimes - more often than not, amazingly enough - he sets the table and asks questions about my and Carl’s life that I’m sure physically pain him; other weeks, he sits and sulks on the couch until I get him to talk.

Once in a while, he’ll show up with scared wounded eyes and no smart remarks. He’s like that today, pale and tired, hands shoved deep in his coat pockets, so I coax him to the living room and offer him hot chocolate on pain of death. 

“You gonna make me get out my crystal ball this time?” I say, when he still hasn’t spoken.

Brian shrugs and sips his hot chocolate.

“Is it work?”

He huffs and shakes his head.

“Gus?”

Another no.

“Justin?”

He stiffens. Bullseye.

I wait, but he doesn’t talk.

“You two have a fight or something?”

He shakes his head again. I remind myself that patience is a virtue.

“We can play twenty questions now, or we can do it during dinner.” Then again, sometimes impatience is a hell of a lot more efficient.

Brian groans and makes like he’s trying to shrink back into the chair. I just keep on looking at him.

He sighs. “I love him,” he says, and- shit, I mean, not that I didn’t know, probably since before he did, but for him to say it out loud to me-

“Sometimes I think that it hurts him. Holds him back. Me loving him.”

He looks really, truly miserable now, and I’m starting to feel a feeling I know very well because of him, this mix of pity and frustration that tempers my tone about as much as it pisses me the hell off.

“What makes you think that?” I say, playing for time, a little.

“Just- he knows how I feel about him, and I don’t want him changing parts of himself just to fit with me.”

“Has he been doing that?”

Brian scrubs his hands over his face. “No. He- no.”

“Okay, then,” I say. “You two _are_ in a relationship, much as you’ve tried to deny it in the past, and for relationships to work, you have to compromise. You are not the same person alone as you are with Justin. Same goes for him. But as long as those compromises make you stronger or happier, as a couple and as individuals, then that’s a good thing. It’s not something to run away from.”

He doesn’t respond. He’s not really even looking at me.

“You’ve been running for most of your life, Brian. Don’t you want to rest?”

He rolls his eyes. “Can you spare me the metaphors? I want him. And I want him to be happy. I just don’t know if those two things can exist at the same time.”

I give him a look. “You think he’s unhappy?”

“I know he is,” Brian says. “Last time I visited him- I don’t fucking know. He was there, but he wasn’t _there_ , and he said a few things about missing home, and I just-”

“You think that by caring about him the way you do you’re hurting his chances in New York?” I say, because I know him well enough to know where this is going and we need to get to the heart of this before anyone else shows up.

He shrugs. “Maybe. Maybe not. I need to know I’m not causing him pain.”

It’s not the best time, for sure, but I have to laugh. “And you came to _me_ for that? If you want to know how Justin feels, why don’t you, I don’t know, fucking talk to him?”

He glares at me and opens his mouth and I’m certain I’m about to get an earful of his standard I-can’t-communicate-like-a-human-being-because-I’m-too-invested-in-my-bad-boy-image bullshit, but the doorbell rings before he can get started.

When I open the door, Justin’s standing there in just a hoodie and jeans, not even a scarf. He doesn’t quite smile when he sees me. “Is Brian here? I-”

I stop doing my guppy impression. “Come in, it’s freezing,” I say, leading him into the entryway. “I thought you weren’t coming back for another couple weeks!”

“Last-minute thing,” Justin says, and then stops in his tracks when he notices Brian, face breaking into that sunny smile of his. Brian’s staring wide-eyed at him, one hand clenched on the arm of the sofa.

“Hey,” Justin says. 

Brian stands, a little shakily. “Hey,” he says back, and then they’re tripping across the room to get to each other, folding into a messy crush of a kiss. I step back to give them a little room - not that they care, I’m sure, but Brian looked as if he might be about to fly apart a moment ago - and watch as they hold on to each other.

A long minute or so later, one of them seems to remember to breathe, and they let go of each other’s faces. I think I see Brian say, “I missed you,” and Justin smiles a little and kisses him again, and it really is shocking, still, how _right_ they look together, the way they fit.

Brian’s still glued to him when they sit down, stroking his hair, leaning close against him with their hands linked. It’s sweet, really, but I realize that I’m not sure I’ve ever seen it before, the way Brian looks cracked open every time Justin kisses him or moves against him.

“Can I get you anything, Sunshine?” I say, when I manage to stop staring. “Cocoa or something?”

Justin opens his mouth, looks at me, closes it. “Cocoa would be great,” he says, smiling.

“Good boy,” I tell him, and Brian bursts out laughing. I can see Justin flipping him off, grinning, as he leans in to kiss him out of the corner of my eye.


End file.
